Dear Readers,
This is the last, for Sun City anyway!
What was a conversation, and what could it mean? Mutual consideration of important things. Communication of experience and memory. Construction of possibilities for the future. To clarify and recognize together, and to observe the changes in a glance, a tone of voice, a silence- the silence of hesitation or understanding. To shape without altering. To laugh, or to sit quietly in common shyness that was never expressed.
Tove Jansson
Dear Friends,
Let this next excerpt from Tove Jansson's Sun City be a warning to us:
It was not until her ninetieth year that Miss Ruthermer-Berkeley began to ask herself whether her long life and not been lacking in what was once called a heart's desire. A much too rigorous upbringing may have had something to do with it, but essentially, she realized, it was all her own fault. Without sense or consideration she had striven for perfection and thus had lived with constant anxiety, anxiety for everything left incomplete the day before- work, duties, conversations- and anxiety for the day to come, which had to be shaped to suit her wishes and the demands she made on herself. Lost in the future and the past she had not been abele to live in her own moment. It was really a great shame, an omission that had probably made no one happy.
I hope you don't recognize yourself in this passage- as for me, well, I wasted miles and years on perfection and anxiety; but there is time, maybe to loiter and play yet left.
Keep an eye out for one more bit from Sun City in a future post- if you don't want me giving you these tiny spoonfuls, you know what to do!
Tove Jansson*
Dear Y'all,
I have two things, from beloved author Tove Jansson for you. I will send you the next one soon. I want to spread out the loveliness, to make it last.
Making it last is why- when I first started reading her books, the three volume edition of Moomin comics that the library acquired 15 years ago or so, and then the wonderful Moomin books, and then, then the amazing books for whatever an "adult" is- I did not rush to finish all her books in 1 or 2 years. I was very sad to have read the last (as in, the only one I hadn't read yet) Moomintroll book, so I have to take care not to read what is left too quickly!
I am not sure exactly how many are left to me now; I have for certain, two on my shelf, and one that I know of but do not have. I guess, if there are say 5 more, and I live another 25 years I should read one every five years? Ah, but even as I write that to you, I see the flaw: what about the unexpected early death!?? What about missing out entirely on the few that are left?? Well, this is the rush and roar of our gambling, gamboling lives, isn't it? Here today and 5 books unread tomorrow! Still, I don't want to be one of these manic over achievers, so, maybe I will read just the two books I have before the end of the year.
But, I digress: Here is Tove Jansson from Sun City, & yes, you should run (but be careful of that bus when you cross the street!) to your library or bookshop so you can read the whole delicious thing.
There has to be time to think, thought Mrs. Morris, an opportunity to reflect. The time that writing requires, a mute communication, would leave space for deliberation. Almost everything we say is marked by haste and thoughtlessness, habit, fear, and the need to impress one another. So much needless triviality, exaggeration, and repetition, so many terrible misunderstandings.
PS
Do you suppose that I am only pacing myself like this because I want to feel superior in my emotionally intelligent plan for delayed gratification? C'est possible.
* I don't need to tell you that you want (desire deeply) to read a book by a woman that looks like this!
Lynx Boa (Self Portrait), 1974, Tove Jansson.
(See also, related: Dodo: 4/28/2025)