I am visiting some of the old haunts today. You will recall I am not so much re-writing my history as rebuilding it into paintings, drawings, and sculptures. I have a few drops of aluminum slag, some handspun wool and a little oval of wood that, combined with the folded pages of 3/4 of 1989, is going to become a small object that is not a book, and not for reading. I hope the object will retain all of the love & affection, and the beauty in those pages, but that the indecision, the insecurity, the fear, and the envy will not be visible.
Before the transmutation though, I am reading it. It's actually quite riveting, but so much of what you want to know isn't given by the author. What about the next room? Wait, why is that person referred to as Margarine Brain? Who is this Paul from the gas station? Where was this ride in the Model A? What was Powwow Highway like? B. brought Finger puppets so you could talk in the movies!- why can't we keep this character around longer? What were the other three measures in the 'quadruple dose of humiliation?'
Alas, my memory is only jogged so far, and so much is without citation. Including this comment: "The 800 foot Snickers Bar that we have made rock & roll into." I knew some poets at that time, and some song-writers, too, and I went to a lot of coffee shop readings, so my best guess is it was one of the poets' lines, but the world may never know. And there's something kind of great about that, too.
We can meditate on what it might mean: That rock & roll is too sweet? Too satisfying? Too commercial? Too packaged? Too packed with peanuts?
Unpacking Snickers generally, the candy bar was named after the Mars' family horse. 'Nickers' (or sometimes 'whickers') is something a horse gives in communication. This, from the Equuisite website:
The Nicker The horse creates a vibrating sound with his mouth closed, from his vocal cords. The strength and tone of the nicker vary greatly, and will tell you what the horse is saying. "Hello, good to see you" - The horse nickers fairly quietly, and moves toward the other horse or person who he is nickering to. "Hi, beautiful!" or "Woo Hoo, you're sexy!" - Usually said by a stallion. This nicker is slightly more intense than the one above, with mating in mind, and accomodated by shaking of the head. "Come closer" - This sound is most usually made by a mare to her foal. It is much softer and quieter than the "hello" nicker. This nicker is usually accomodated by a nudge from the horse's nose (usually towards her flanks to protect her foal from danger).
I imagine that author Cheryl Sutor (What is Your Horse Saying? June, 1999) meant to use the word 'accompanied' in the places where 'accomodated' is used.
Here also is a recipe for Snickers Salad, because it obviously relates to this little grouping of ideas. Wikipedia tells me that Snickers Salad is found in Iowa, at church suppers and the like. I tell you, nothing could be more satisfying than loading your car up with rock & roll, a blank journal, and heading out I-o-way to find this salad in its native habitat!