Dear Diners,
It's time for a salad manifesto. Deal with it.
1. It must be composed of less than you think. If you have 8 different things in the bowl, beyond what is making up the dressing, you should take half of them out.
2. It must have salt. You could skip pepper, but you cannot skip salt.
3. It must also have oil, and unless you love your salads, you should begin by doubling what you currently put in.
4. It must NOT taste so much of acid that your eyes water. Begin by cutting the vinegar or lemon juice that you use by at least half, and probably you want about 1/4 of what you currently use.
5. You may put sweet things in it, but only two at the absolute most! You may have apples, and honey, but not dried cherries also! That is WAY too much- see the first rule.
6. You should be able to taste all the things you have put in, which means your dressing should not be so strong that you cannot taste the lettuce or greens.
Additionally, you may put kale or other cruciferous vegetables in your salad, but they are pretty tough, so consider always when you make a salad that your goal is a kind of almost delicacy. Cheese and nuts are fine in salad, tortilla chips are not. Crisped up bread in all forms is welcome in salad, beans are okay in moderation. Minced shallots are perfect in salad. Dried fruit is acceptable, but not if you have already poured a cup of candied nuts in! Candied nuts plus dried fruit makes your salad into a Clif Bar.
Lastly, these are not the rules for slaws, these are strictly salad rules, and they do not apply to pasta salad, bean salad, rice salad, jello salad, tuna salad, ham salad, or broccoli salad. If you don't like these rules, make your own!
: Many thanks to Judy Rogers, whose salad rules have guided me for years, and are much of the inspiration for the manifesto.
